The Phil Silvers Show episode that I was referring to (see today's first post) was:
Bilko's Perfect Day (Written by Nat Hiken, Billy Friedburg & Terry Ryan; originally broadcast: May 21st 1957)
For the first time in his life, absolutely everything is going right for Sgt. Bilko - it is his lucky day. Unfortunately, he only realizes this as the day is drawing to a close...
So, there you go!
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:53 pm
It's happening again
I'm getting lots of direct hits to this blog. There's always one or two because some of you out there have added this site to your "favourites"* but at the moment there are too many direct hits to account for in this way.
Someone last week left me a comment to say that they'd typed in the URL as printed in their newspaper. What newspaper? Please tell me, people! Where are you coming from? How did you find out about this site?
* as Microsoft Internet Explorer will insist on calling them, although I much prefer the Netscape terminology of "bookmarks"
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:52 pm
Losing things and then finding them again
Last night I found my favourite dress (black devorre, semi see-thru, very nice!), which I had lost and have been searching for, for simply ages. Hurrah, I'm so pleased!
Then, later on I went out to Tesco to do a little shopping. As you do. I mean I'd hardly go round there to watch a video or to paint my toenails, would I? Tsh! What are you like?
Anyway, having bought a big trolley-load of stuff, I stopped at the Customer Services desk and asked the lady there if they have had any Tesco Club Cards handed in, because I'd lost mine. "Yes, we've got one or two", she said, and rummaging around in a drawer she produced a whacking great big bundle of them tied up with an elastic band. Then she produced another. And another... And...
In all I think she placed seven or eight such bundles of cards in front of me, and handed me the first saying "Would you like to start looking through these, as obviously you'll recognise your own signature."
"Bloody hell," I thought. "I'm going to be here all night!"
But, would you believe it? I'd only been looking for a minute when I found my card about three quarters of the way through that very first bunch. Usually in these cases whatever you are looking for turns up in the very last possible place - or in this case - the final bunch of cards. Perhaps, I'd selected the "final bunch" first, and thus taken a short-cut to reunification of self and plastic! Whatever, I felt that the Gods were looking down on me, and cursed myself for not having done the lottery earlier in the evening. (I'm reminded here of the episode of The Phil Silvers Show in which Sgt Bilko is having "his lucky day" on which he can do no wrong, only he doesn't know it!)
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:18 pm
Wow! I've had simply loads of positive comments (some in the comments on this blog, some via email, some on message boards I frequent) about my "new look". I was a little unsure about posting those pictures for the world to see yesterday, but I'm glad I did now because they've had such a good reaction that it's made me feel really good about myself. For a change, as I'm quite well practised at feeling wretched about myself.
Vanity, eh? Who would be dealing with all that malarkey?
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:25 am
Tuesday, October 29, 2002
New hair: the new me?
I just uploaded some of my self-portrait photos from the weekend, where I was trying out my new look. Taking pictures of yourself is tricky because you've always got this outstretced arm in the shot, and also because the proximity of the camera can make your face appear enormous as if you are looking at a reflection in the back of a spoon.
But, yeah! I think I like this new look.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:30 am
Monday, October 28, 2002
What vile weather! How many people have been killed in the gales in the UK? Nine, isn't it? I know that there was a death in Oxford when a woman was crushed when a tree fell on her car. It's a nasty business.
Last night my sister and her family were all stuck in France awaiting a ferry home, after a trip to EuroDisney with the kids. Still, better to be safe and on dry land than to be out at sea in the middle of all that chaos.
Yesterday I didn't leave the house; it seemed a safer bet just to stay indoors. Had a neighbour's cat come inside seeking sanctuary (I'm sure the so-called owners can't even allow it into their house. People like that shouldn't be allowed to keep animals). For most of the day it behaved itself, just sitting quietly curled up in the corner of the room. Then early evening it trotted into the kitchen and nicked some of my cat's food. It then went back to the corner, and I admonished it - though not in a nasty way - saying "Cat, you don't want to go pushing your luck around here, else my cat will come and bat you one if you step out of line", and this little cat just looked up at me sweetly, and then vomited copiously.
So I had lots of cat sick to clear up. Which was fun. Not.
This morning the trains are all buggered. It took an hour before my train turned up at the station, and then when we got on board, it sat there for ages before moving off. I suppose the rail network is in disarray because of power failures, fallen trees on lines, etc. Still, even considering all that it's not fun having to wait in the cold on the platform for over an hour and listening to all those recorded announcements proclaiming "I'm extremely sorry to announce that the..." and getting crosser and crosser.
No, you are not "extremely sorry". You are a recording and therefore incapable of expressing sorrow or any other kind of emotive repsonse.
Unless, that is, the railway companies have developed the technology to allow machines to feel emotion. And not even Data from Star Trek: The Next Generation was able to feel emotion and that was set way into the future. What does Didcot station know that the Starship Enterprise didn't? (or should that be "wouldn't"?)
posted by Gina Snowdoll 2:11 pm
Sunday, October 27, 2002
Winter: it's official
All over the country people have been saying, "Ooh! The clocks go back Saturday night, that means I get an extra hour in bed!"
But in reality cats still want feeding at the same time as befits their biological clocks (and make a hell of a racket meowing outside your bedroom door to tell you so) and next door's kids still wake up at the same time and cry and bawl. So much for the extra hour!
Meanwhile there's a raging gale outside. When I was in the bathroom just now I heard something fall and smash during one particularly strong gust of wind, but I haven't found anything broken yet. Let's hope it was next door.
So, what did you do with your extra hour?
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:57 am
Saturday, October 26, 2002
Well... the new hair looks great... dead sexy. I tried taking a self-portrait style photo of myself, but it just wasn't working. Grrrrrr...
So, all dressed up and nowhere to go. *sigh*
I've logged on and tried a couple of chat rooms but they were boring me to tears. Well, not quite to tears - don't want to wreck the eyeshadow/mascara.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:28 pm
Been busy today doing guitary things. And hopefully in a few moments I'll be able to get in the bathroom and try out some make-up looks, as I want to see what the new hair looks like when I'm all made up.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 7:01 pm
Friday, October 25, 2002
Speaking of new releases...
I see that Eddie Izzard has a new video (and DVD, curse, spit...) coming out soon. The show in question is "Circle" which - when Annie and I saw it in Manchester - was comprised of about 60% or more of material from "Dress to Kill". However, the show on the video was filmed in New York, possibly towards the end of the run of that show, so perhaps by then he'd worked in even more original material and edged out the "Dress to Kill" stuff.
But I don't know if I'm going to buy it. I used to be a major Izzard fan, but in the last couple of years I've gone off him big time. I think he became very complacent, he was recycling old material so much that it was embarrassing, and he only seemed interested in getting into movies. And I can't say that any of the parts I've seen him in were particularly noteworthy. Perhaps I'm not being fair and he's done some outstanding film work since I last saw him in anything, but I've kinda lost interest, y'know.
And then there's the whole transvestite thing. I used to think he was a really good ambassador for TVs and the transgendered. And then he started talking too much bollocks about it (usually whilst looking very butch and often bearded at the same time and thus really confusing the issue) and that made me think he had somehow betrayed us (the transgendered). And now, I can't really remember why I thought that, but don't really think he knows what he is talking about half the time. He just opens his mouth and words come out. Just anything. I think his mouth moves faster than his brain does.
An example of the confusion: sometimes he will talk enthusiastically about the "transgendered" and then other times he'll talk about being a "bloke in a dress".
As anyone who knows me will know, I hate the word "bloke" with a passion. It is a horrible, ugly word, and most certainly should never be used when talking about the transgendered. Unless perhaps we are talking about a female to male transsexual who is trying to act "blokey".
There - the word "blokey". You all know what it means. But you couldn't substitute for it the word "manny". That wouldn't work, would it? As I have said before an annoying amount of times, the word "bloke" cannot be used satisfactorily in the place of the word "man" or "male". I maintain that a "bloke" is a certain type of man. A certain amount of laddishness and/or oikishness is implied.
I actually get quite offended if anyone dares to use that revolting word when referring to me. I am not a bloke. I have never been one and I never will. I consider myself to be transgendered, which means part of my make up is female. I don't like that being negated by the use of that oikish label, which to me is the equivalent of calling a woman a "bird" or a "tart". Not nice.
So, don't ever call me a bloke. Or I will mascara your nasal hair!
posted by Gina Snowdoll 12:25 pm
Tom Jones says he's insulted when women throw their knickers at him if they haven't been wearing them. Jones says he's fed-up with women bringing extra pairs of pants in plastic bags to his concerts to throw at him. He says when the tradition first began in the sixties "the whole thing was authentic. Nowadays they bring along a plastic bag with their underwear in it," Jones tells German magazine Bunte. "It has nothing to do with enthusiasm any more. I actually take it as an insult. "I give it my all on stage because I want to fill the crowd with enthusiasm - but that which comes from the heart and not out of a plastic bag."
Yeah, too right Tom. There you are night after night, singing your arse off, and the fans can't even be bothered to take their own knickers down to throw at you. It's a crying shame. I mean, anyone would think you did it for the money.
All the dirt on the Ulrika Jonsson / John Leslie story is here courtesy of The Sun. In typical Sun fashion, at the bottom of one page they finish with "HAVE YOU BEEN A VICTIM OF JOHN LESLIE? CALL THE SUN NEWS DESK ON 020 7782 4103".
Yes, rape is a serious business, but The Sun's hyperbolic reporting style smacks of media hysteria.
But then on the other hand, the BBC News are downplaying the whole story (it's tucked away on their "Entertainment" page) and don't even name John Leslie, despite the fact that he's mentioned everywhere else. Most curious.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:57 am
A right Nana
Nana Mouskouri was on Graham Norton's show last night. She looks exactly the same as she did, twenty, thirty years ago. I seem to remember her appearing on The Morecambe and Wise Show, things like that, and she hasn't changed. I'm not saying that she looks as if she's discovered the fountain of youth, or conversely that she looked old way back then. She has this weird ageless quality to her looks. But surely, she must be in her seventies by now? (They may have touched upon this on the programme, but I was on the phone and the telly was on in the background so I wasn't paying that much attention).
Maybe she is a zombie. Or one of the undead - a vampire! I think we should be told. What we need is a volunteer to go drive a stake through her heart so as we can find out for once and all.*
* Gina Snowdoll reserves the right not to be held responsible in the event of any unpleasant following some lunatic actually doing this.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:46 am
Wednesday, October 23, 2002
I've not really got much news or things to tell. I'm all out of amusing anecdotes and absurd ruminations. I don't even want to rant and rave about anything. There's nothing I want to get off my chest; as chests go, it is totally devoid of things sitting upon it.
However, I do have a nice little website project to work upon, and will be turning my attentions to that later tonight (having already collected a few images and fonts that I think I will need). I'll tell you all about it at a later date, but I'm quite excited about being allowed to let loose with the design.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 12:39 pm
S...L...O...W... (to be said in a slurred voice)
So, this is why the internet is so slow at the moment.
It makes you wonder about the mentality of the people who carry out these attacks. Yeah, I know they could be doing worse things like killing, but all the same they must be incredibly sad sad people.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:13 am
Tuesday, October 22, 2002
Anyone fancy a prune?
I just found a bag of dried prunes in my desk drawer. They've been there a few weeks, and are the remnants of a bag of assorted dried fruits. I ate the rest. I just don't like prunes.
Perhaps I could auction them on eBay?
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:18 pm
Mmmmm... I had a really nice sleep last night. For a change!
Why is it that being in a state of unconciousness is so pleasurable?
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:50 am
Monday, October 21, 2002
Was it Chinese Whispers?
Armed police officers? Robbers in the bank? Well, according to the BBC website:
Lloyds bank sealed off part of Oxford city centre was sealed off by the police on Monday due to an incident at a bank. The alarm was raised early in the morning. Officers with dogs were called out and searched the area around the Lloyds bank. St Aldates, the High Street and part of Cornmarket was sealed off.
Nothing was found by the police.
Which doesn't sound anywhere near as exciting. Unless the truth is being suppressed.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:29 am
Excitement in Oxford
Apparently in the centre of Oxford this morning there are roads closed off and there are armed police in doorways, hanging out of windows, etc. No-one knows what is going on yet. Will keep you informed!
Update: Word has got about that it's a siege at Lloyds Bank. Staff turned up at the bank this morning to find bankrobbers inside!
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:57 am
All that glistens
Well, Shel came over this weekend and we did this 'n' that. Which consisted of such exciting things as repairing the shed roof (new felt), and also Shel helped me with putting together the latest guitar project that I'm working on (drilling holes, etc). In the evening we had a bite to eat and then got ourselves fabulised. First time I've put a dress on in ages! Actually, I wanted to try a few different looks out - see which bits and pieces fitted - and I ended up wearing four different dresses throughout the evening.
One I wore was a gold sparkly dress, except it seemed that the gold was coming off. It was everywhere: on the floor, on the sofa where I'd been sitting, all over the cat, etc. I decided that it was flaking too much (although the cat didn't seem to mind) so I changed it for a silver velvet dress that I'm particularly fond of (it's very comfortable for one thing). I also started off the evening in very high platform stilettos, but these are better for wearing when you're going out rather than around the house, so I pretty soon changed them for something a bit more comfortable and with a lower heel.
We had a couple of bottles of wine and watched a video, namely "The Sixth Sense" which was very good and which had one hell of a twist at the end.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:12 am
Friday, October 18, 2002
Ahhhh... me hearties...
Today, I am mostly impersonating Captain Birdseye.
I'll try to be a bit more glamourous tomorrow.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 3:17 pm
This morning does not find me in good cheer, I'm afraid. It's cold, wet and damp, and I've got a headache. And I didn't get long enough in bed, so that's not good. Also, the weekend is long overdue. This week has been horrendously slow. I mean, I was thinking it must be Friday back on Wednesday.
Sorry for the negative post. I'll think of something amusing/witty/clever/silly (delete as applicable) later.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:43 am
Thursday, October 17, 2002
We are the goon squad and we're coming to town... Beep Beep...
Here's interesting: I was listed in this article about Fashion Blogs on an Australian website.
I am not worthy! It was always my intention to talk about clothes and fashion on this blog, but I hardly ever seem to do so. I have to confess that I've not bought an outfit for simply ages (but then again haven't had the occasion to do so) and despite being the self-proclaimed "Imelda Marcos of Didcot" I cannot honestly remember the last time I bought a pair of shoes. (Having said that, there's a pair that I've got my eyes on...)
I don't think that I really follow fashion as such. I'm interested but I don't buy women's magazines to see what the latest looks are. I basically make mental notes on what people are wearing in the street, at work, for going out, etc. It always disturbs me that there is too much blue denim about. I hate blue denim, and - sorry I'll upset a few of you out there - think the best thing you could do with a denim jacket is to burn the bloody thing. They have no style.
Funny too that there are so many girls wearing stilettos these days. A few years ago on the tranny scene, girls would say to us, "But real girls don't wear stilettos." (Actually, I did stop wearing them for ages, and found some other far more fashionable - but equally high - heels, but as I say, they've come back into fashion again).
I never really did the daytime look though. I was alays far more interested in looking glam for going out, so that meant dresses, high heels and fabby make-up. I just chose clothes that I knew would suit me. Short dresses and skirts do absolutely nothing for my figure, but I found I could look very elegant in long slinky dresses. Oh, and I had nothing against slits so you could show off a bit of leg. I mean, you don't want to end up hobbling around like Morticia Adams.
I never really got into skirts and tops, though. I always meant to experiment, but it never really happened for me. So, good ol' predictable Gina - she'll always be in a long slinky dress and high heels. But at least it makes a change from all the trannies who think that the tarty look - short dresses right up to yer bum - is the way to go. I never did "tarty". Always "sophisticated" for me, thank you very much.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:35 am
At home today
I did try going to work, but sitting around waiting for best part of two hours at Didcot Station with only the vague possibility of a train - perhaps - in the next hour just isn't good enough.
So, I thought "Bugger this" and came back home.
I mean what's the point? It'd be midday before I'd get to the office - if at all - and then later I'd have the worry about how I'd get back home again.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:03 am
Wednesday, October 16, 2002
Number One super guy
I reckon that the little guy in accounts is really Hong Kong Phooey. I mean nobody could be that much of a prat in real life. It's got to be an act.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:28 am
Wow! I just reached 30,000 on the SiteMeter hits counter for this site. Not that it actually means much (return visits, etc) but it feels kinda impressive. Even if it isn't.
By the way, hit number 30,000 itself was an "unknown".
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:05 am
Tuesday, October 15, 2002
Start building the ark!
I had a bit of a weird journey home tonight. Firstly all the trains were delayed due to "adverse weather conditions", then at Didcot there was a great big crowd of people trying to get down the stairs from the platform to the subway beneath. There was some kind of hold up stopping people moving down the stairs. Turns out that the subway was flooded and a team of station porters were ferrying passengers through to the station foyer on luggage trolleys! I felt well silly riding the trolley, but I didn't want to get my boots soaked through.
Then on walking back to my house I found that the underpass that I normally walk beneath was also flooded, so I had to take a long detour to avoid it.
So, tomorrow I'm going to take spare shoes and socks along with my brolly. Need to be prepared.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 6:42 pm
Why aren't I sleeping at the moment? 'Cos you're at your desk at work? Yes I know that, fool! You know what I mean, I'm talking about at night when I'm supposed to be sleeping. I just feel totally knackered all the time these days. Perhaps I'll try to get an early night tonight.
In other news: not much else, really.
Last night I watched telly: quite a few good comedy programmes on BBC2, of which The Office starring Ricky Gervais was particularly cringeworthy. I read somewhere the other day that the same people who grew up hiding behind the sofa whilst watching Doctor Who are now pulling their sofas out to hide behind when watching The Office. Which I thought was quite apt. I found myself watching most of the programme last night from between the gaps in my fingers!
After watching The Peter Kay Thing on Channel 4 I read the first couple of chapters of The Hollow Chocolate Bunnies of the Apocalypse by Robert Rankin. It's started out nicely enough, but I get the feeling that Robert Rankin has gone all Tom Holt. Which is fitting because in the last Tom Holt book I read I felt that he was telling a Rankineque story.
* If anyone actually gets that, I'll award them a special prize
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:29 am
Monday, October 14, 2002
A nice pear
Just to illustrate to you the kind of mad reckless lifestyle that I lead and the crazy off-the-wall things I sometimes do, I just bought some pears.
What a vile morning! Cold, wet, damp, windy and dark. And first day the train has been late since the timetable was rescheduled. Which meant waiting on the platform in the cold, the wet and the damp, in the wind and the darkness.
Actually the whole weekend has been no great shakes. I only ventured out of the house once, and that was to get the paper and some shopping on Saturday.
Friday night was ruined for me by a certain phonecall, which I won't say any more about, but it soured the whole weekend. Saturday I stayed in bed for as long as I could and eventually got up at midday. (I nearly type "noon" there, but then realised that I never say "noon", so it would have been totally out of character for me). Didn't do much else on Saturday. Watched scraps of telly (the "How Do I Look" programme presented by Ulrika Jonsson was dire but strangely compelling at the same time), drifted on and off the internet, read the paper, etc.
Oh, I won a certain something on an eBay auction. Won it by the skin of my teeth. Thing was, I was making a CD compilation for Mia at the time, then remembered that this auction was finishing and logged on to bid, but my computer was so slow because all its resources were occupied in burning the CD. I think I eventually got my bid through with just 30 seconds to spare before the end of the auction. You could say it was quite hairy (in more ways than one).
Sunday was more of the same really, only I got up much earlier because the next door neighbours were making such a damned racket. (Kids). Then more telly, etc. Started watching "A Clockwork Orange" on Channel 4 which was disturbing but hard to tear yourself away from at the same time. Gave up after an hour (although I left the video recording it) and went to bed and finished off "Carter Beats The Devil". Fantastic novel. I wish I could write like that, but the research alone must have taken years.
Then I didn't sleep for ages, so am feeling absolutely wiped out now.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:15 am
I'll post some more later as I'm very busy today, but that's good because I've been coming up with some superb design ideas for the company website.
This is one of the things about being a designer. You can find yourself going nowhere for days on end, stuck in an idealess cul-de-sac, then suddenly inspiration will strike (for me, this occurs usually when I'm in the shower or in bed in the middle of the night) and within a couple of hours you can produce loads of good work plus several variations on a theme (as I always believe in giving people a choice of ideas, and also like taking a concept and applying the "What if...?" approach).
posted by Gina Snowdoll 12:13 pm
Thursday, October 10, 2002
Mum's the word
Last night my Mum rang me (right in the middle of Coronation Street, which is bizarre because I though she watched that) telling me all about some guy she'd seen on Television who writes a website, which in turn led to him writing a column in The Guardian, and which has now been turned into a book (a novel, I believe).
After a bit of probing, I worked out that she was talking about Mil Millington, and I told her that I was aware of his works - well the column in The Guardian's Saturday "Weekend" magazine anyway. To be honest, I've always found him a bit smug. Well, I've always thought that his writing style was smug and self-satisfied; for all I know he could be a lovely charming person in real life. (Did you see that? The cunning way in which I inserted a semicolon into that last sentence? I like semicolons; my fondness for them is the stuff of legend. Ooh! There I go again!)
But I digress. (Something else I'm known for). The point is that what with all these mentions the dear ol' Grauniad has been giving me recently, my Mum has been dead impressed and has even been thinking of starting up her own blog. (Oh, and another thing I'm known for is all these asides in parentheses). She's a bit of a writer, my Mum. I think she's working on her third novel at the moment. Alas, she's not had the first one published yet and the second one is temporarily shelved, but she keeps plugging away trying to find an agency or a publisher that might be interested. She's had interest but not from any company that is willing to put its money where its mouth is. (Does a company have a mouth?) Anyway, next time I go visit my parents, I have promised to show my Mum how to go about this blogging malarkey, show her how it all works.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:01 pm
Yesterday I was speaking about The Magic Roundabout and hot on the heels of my blatherings comes this story, which I think you'll agree is a spooky coincidence.
What simply dreadful casting choices, though. Robbie "Moneybags" Williams as Dougal and that vile Kylie woman as Florence.
And what is it with her arse? Always sticking it out like that. Stand up straight, woman!
posted by Gina Snowdoll 12:22 pm
Wednesday, October 09, 2002
Happy Birthday Dear Roundabout
I saw on the local news earlier tonight that today is the 30th Birthday of Swindon's now legendary Magic Roundabout, a feature of that great town (eh?) that I have written about many a time*.
* Well, I mentioned it here, here and - in passing - here and here. I'm not obsessed, honest, just incredulous that someone could have dreamed up something so crazy in the name of town planning. Funny also that I seemed to have inextricably linked the name of Wreckless Eric to that damned roundabout. (It was his fault, he started it!) I really ought to associate XTC with the roundabout, as not only are they Swindon lads themselves, but they also wrote a song about it.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:21 pm
As Gillian pointed out to me, didn't all the people listed in that Guardian article end up in captivity of one form or another? Ought I to start worrying? And should I warn ScaryDuck? (Mind if he's really scary, I'm going to keep my distance before all the ferocious quacking starts, the flapping of wings and the clashing of duckbill against skull bones. Sorry, I'll shut up now.)
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:03 pm
Back to the grind
I'm back at work today, which feels kind of bleurgghhhy, if that makes sense, and I'm sure it does.
Not much else to tell. Oxford is still here and didn't vanish during my absense. Or at least, if it did vanish, it's back now.
OK, OK, I'm going. Will be back when I've got something sensible to say. Or else something really spectacularly silly.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 8:12 am
Tuesday, October 08, 2002
Fame wanted... over here... Me me me ME!!!
Thanks to Mel for pointing this out to me. It's nice of The Guardian to keep on giving me these little mentions. (And I quote: "Weblogs often take the form of online diaries, and they get no better than the life of a cat-loving transvestite Gina Snowdoll - a blogger with a passion for high heels, semicolons and telling it like it is."). Actually, I must be really slow off the mark today not to have found that link myself, but I've just checked my sitemeter and sure enough...
Now will someone PLEASE give me my own column in a magazine or a newspaper or something, so I can give up the day job. What do you mean the pay wouldn't cover it? (Not fair).
Actually a few years back I was offered my own magazine column, in which I could write about whatever I liked. As long as that was reporting about going out and about to tranny clubs. But there was a catch. This was to be a column in a - how shall we say? - specialist magazine. I don't remember the title now, although I expect it was something ultra-original like "Transvestite". (Must watch that sarcasm before it gets out of hand).
So, my suspicions being aroused, I wrote back to the magazine's editor saying that I'd love to write for them, but that I had one major condition, and that was that I would not contribute to a publication that featured pornographic pictures of transvestites (or anyone else come to that), as I felt that such publications were not in our best interest.
Seeing as how I've had a ceaseless stream of emails* asking me whatever became of my regular Monday "Deer of the week" feature, I bring you this story that Angola's 'lost' giant antelope is found alive. It's one of those species thought to have been hunted to extinction and wiped out, is in fact very much still alive and making a go of it stories. You can't keep a good deer down! And shame on you for trying.
* I was being uncharacteristically sarcastic. I didn't receive a single email about the errant "Deer of the week" feature. Not one. Not a dicky bird. You heartless bastards! Perhaps I should take to doing the mind-numbingly banal "Friday Five" each week. That would teach you.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 2:15 pm
I'm still off work, although I think I'll have to go in tomorrow. (Groan). The headaches come and go. Last night's was particularly bad and I felt really sickly. Had trouble getting off to sleep.
The whole weekend I've been trying to take things easy. Saturday I just stayed in and read the paper, and watched some telly in the evening. Sunday, I pottered about, and watched "The Others" on video - superb film and one hell of a twist. In the evening it was more telly (Scrapheap Challenge, several new Simpsons episodes, Malcolm In The Middle, etc), then the headache started really hurting so I went to bed.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 12:11 pm
The very idea! You ought to be ashamed!
posted by Gina Snowdoll 10:10 am
Saturday, October 05, 2002
Would anyone out there - who has the technology and the goodwill - be able to record David Bowie Live and Exclusive on Radio 2 at 8pm tonight for me?
I don't have the technology. I don't even have a radio.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 2:58 pm
What the morning brings
I'm still not feeling too hot, but at least I managed to get more than a few hours sleep last night. Yesterday, after posting on the blog, I decided I really was quite hungry and that only toast would do - besides there wasn't much food in the house anyway - so I crawled around to Tesco (10 minutes walk from my house). Bloody hell! Midday on a Friday is not the time to go. It must've been the graveyard shift! The place was crawling with old people. Well, not crawling, for these were old people with a mission, and - hell - they were vicious. Zooming about the place, they were. Don't let anyone get past you, don't let any young pale sick-looking whippersnappers get in your way. I was quite taken aback.
I must've looked poorly, for even the checkout girl asked me if I was alright. Still, I felt a lot better when I'd got home and more importantly got some food inside me.
Didn't do much for the rest of the day. Watched telly in the evening, even though most of it was crap. Tried watching some X Files repeats on Sky but was feeling too tired and couldn't concentrate, so went to bed early.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:29 am
Friday, October 04, 2002
Did anyone tape "Faking It" on Channel 4 the other night? It was the episode in which they took an ex naval officer and turned him into a drag queen.
I so need to see this.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 1:44 pm
Knocked for six
After the Bowie gig on Wednesday night, I stayed over with Mia at her sister's flat which was just a very short walk from the Hammersmith Apollo. What with the tube strike it would have been near impossible to get home at that hour. In the morning I made my way straight to Paddington and from there onto Oxford on the train and got to work at about 11:00 (I'd phoned in to say I was running later). However, I had to leave work again at 2:00pm because I was feeling so very tired and had an enormous headache.
By the time I had reached home this had turned itself into a fully-fledged fever and I went straight to bed and slept from 3:00 to 7:00pm. I then had a little something to eat and watched a little telly, although I still had the mother of all headaches. I brought a quilt downstairs and lay on the sofa and watched an X Files repeat (which I hadn't seen before) and The League of Gentlemen. Thoroughly tired after this I returned to bed. But my headache was so intense, I was getting hot and cold flushes and I had flashing lights before my eyes as if there were some kind of electrical disturbance in my brain. Can you believe I even looked towards the mirror in the dark to see if I could see the flashes reflected back at me? And these flashes happened even when my eyes were shut.
So, delirious, I drifted in and out of a very disturbed sleep and woke this morning at 9:00 - still with that immense headache. I phoned in to work to say I wouldn't be in, then raided the cupboards in the kitchen to see what pills I could find. I eventually found some Anadin Extra and took two. The headache is now easing off a bit (else I wouldn't be able to tolerate a computer screen, I can tell you!) but is still there nagging away.
And I desperately crave toast, but there is no bread in the house. Reckon I'm going to have to brave a trip out to the shops, but I still feel so very weak.
I don't know what has brought this on.
Well... perhaps that's not true. I have a theory, but it might sound really far-fetched. I think it might be a bad case of "coming down" after the high of experiencing the David Bowie gig. Sounds mad? Sherri will know what I mean, as she knows what it is like to come down with a crash after a weekend of trannying (which also sounds mad, but is a very real condition, believe me). Also Mia texted me to say that she was in "delayed shock about seeing Bowie live... feeling very emotional..."
I know exactly how she feels.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:27 am
Thursday, October 03, 2002
...and your big fat dog
David Bowie, Hammersmith Apollo, 2 October 2002 What can I say about last night's Bowie gig at Hammersmith? If you're not into Bowie you'd never understand it. You would think I was strange getting all emotional when the man walked out onto the stage and began singing "Life On Mars". Mia sitting next to me was trying to pass me the little binoculars that you get from the back of the the seats for 50p. "Do you want to look through these?" she asked. "No," I waved her away, tears streaming down my face.
Hell, why was I crying? I wasn't sad or unhappy. This was a man who's music I've enjoyed for best part of the last thirty years. Maybe, that's why. David Bowie has to be my all time favourite music artist, and before a couple of days ago, I thought I'd never get to see him, to experience his songs live.
And then "Ashes To Ashes" started up, and I began blubbing again.
It was a simply amazing gig. The band were all shit-hot and proficient musicians. David's voice was on top-notch form, and his stage banter made us all laugh. "Not only is this the last song of the night, but it is also the last time we will ever play during this fucking tube strike!" he announced to a delighted audience. (Actually, it wasn't the last song at all - there were 12 songs in the encore! Or should that be "after the interval"?)
He also treated us to a display of his new-found skill of levitating, so magician David Blaine had better watch his back!
High points? THE WHOLE GIG. It was amazing. A wonderful mix of songs: nine from "Heathen", a handful from "Low", a couple of instrumental tracks ("Speed Of Life" and "A New Career In A New Town"), shed loads of the big hits, plus oddities such as "Alabama Song" (a.k.a. "Moon Of Alabama") and "The Bewlay Brothers" which was apparently being performed live in a theatre for the first time.
At the end of an electrifying performance of "Moonage Daydream", Bowie grabbed a black and silver tinsel boa that someone had thrown on the stage and wound it round his neck. "I left it last time I played here," he joked. "I found it under a chair".
Also - Mia and I loved this bit - during the song "Everyone Says Hi" and when he reached the line "...and your big fat dog", someone threw a cuddly big fat dog stuffed toy onto the stage. Hey, this is turning into the Rocky Horror Show!
Not much else to say. If you don't like Bowie then all this is probably pretty meaningless and you can't see what the fuss is about. But if you're a fan, like I am, you will understand my joy.
NME Review (and no, I didn't nick my set-list from there - I faithfully scrawled it all down on the back of an envelope during the gig, even though I couldn't see what I was writing so my handwriting looks most spidery).
posted by Gina Snowdoll 11:22 am
Bowie Set List
I'll write a proper report of the gig later when I'm feeling more awake. For now, here's the set list:
Life On Mars?
Ashes to Ashes
Look Back In Anger
Speed Of Life (instrumental)
Be My Wife
I'm Afraid Of Americans
5:15 The Angels Have Gone
I've Been Waiting For You
Heathen (The Rays)
I Would Be Your Slave
A New Career In A New Town (instrumental)
Everyone Says 'Hi'
The Bewlay Brothers
Sound and Vision
I'm going to leave early to go into London, as today - of all days - there is a tube strike, so it could take me hours to get from Paddington to Hammersmith. I'll tell you all about it tomorrow. If I'm still awake.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 2:16 pm
These things aren't supposed to be difficult!
Well the person I thought was going to be coming to the Bowie gig with me tonight can't make it after all. Grrrrrrr...
So, I thought... who else do I know that LOVES Bowie? Well, there's Mia. I know she was trying to get tickets yesterday and failed. So, I've been trying all morning so far to get a message through to her, but the only mobile number I have for her is an old one and may have been superseded, and I don't know if she can access her emails at work.
If she doesn't contact me by lunchtime then I'm going to have to find someone else urgently.
If you want to go, keep checking back as you may be in luck.
UPDATE: OK, it's sorted. I'll be going with Mia.
posted by Gina Snowdoll 9:38 am
Tuesday, October 01, 2002
YES! Guess who has got two tickets to see David Bowie at the Hammersmith Apollo tomorrow night?